My Politically Correct Easter Letter

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Dear nieces and nephews gender neutral offspring: 

It’s Easter that politically incorrect season celebrated by Christians radical right-wing conspiracy theorists and you know what that means. . .peace on earth because of the news of Jesus Christ Easter bunnies, eggs, and propaganda, as well as a reminder that most churches are still locked down due to the China virus COVID-19.  

Uncle Ollie put a sign in the front yard with a cross symbol of oppression on it but the ridiculous Homeowner’s Association asked him to take it down. I wish you could have seen his face! Not only did he refuse rebel against authority, he built an actual wooden cross symbol of oppression and division that’s six-foot tall and planted it in the front garden! Go Ollie! Oh no, Ollie!

Sadly, it disappeared overnight. I suspect the neighbor across the street. He’s a radical liberal university-educated Biden supporter who happens to believe that discrimination is wrong unless you’re a Democrat taking a stand for justice. From what he told us after-the-fact, the cross religious symbol represents white supremacy. Who knew?

I’m trying not to let this dampen my spirits. There’s already so much going on in our great state of Texas COVID super-spreader hub. Maybe you’ve heard about our situation at the border. That crazy Joe remarkable President Biden has flung wide the door and invited criminals, rapists, drug dealers, coyotes, and smugglers poor, innocent migrants in search of a better life into our great state, no questions asked. He plans to give them free shelter, food, and free education. To say our amazing conservative Governor Greg Abbott isn’t thrilled would be the understatement of the century. 

Ollie’s so upset he’s ready to drive down to the border to fix the problem himself. But, what can he do? This is one time when we have to lean on those in charge, whether we want to or not! 

Speaking of which, we were so proud of Ted Cruz and the other 18 Senators those radical Trump legislators who visited the border and reported on the atrocities amazing progress the Biden administration is making there. 

Maybe it’s better if I don’t say much more about that. 

Anyway, we’re turning our thoughts to our faith religious crutch this weekend and trying  to ignore what’s happened in our own backyard. Those goofy Dems amazing Democrats would have you believe that we don’t care about the poor, downtrodden because we don’t ascribe to the heinous open-border compassionate all-are-welcome policy. Nothing could be farther from the truth! We plan to spend Sunday afternoon feeding the elderly in our local nursing home. 

I’m so glad that horrible Emmy-award winning governor-god, Andrew Cuomo, isn’t in charge of their care here to offer his amazing insight. (Can you imagine?) Don’t even get Ollie started on all that. 

Anyway, I guess I should wrap things up. I’m planning to bake cookies for the neighbor kids before bed. We plan to deliver them tomorrow morning, along with eggs filled with Bible verses propaganda. 

I hope all is well in your liberal blue states neck of the woods. Uncle Ollie and I are praying for all of you wishing you well and hopeful you will remain in good health safely locked down.  

Love, 

Aunt gender neutral Annie

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